What NOT to buy a woman as gift this season

* Bathroom scales (even if she begs you for them) - the answer as a man is to say ‘"Who cares what the scales say, YOU my love, are perfect in any shape!”’
• Plates or cutlery - are not pleasant to receive for the holidays! I was once given an entire kitchen crockery set and was a little offended as it makes a woman feel like an unpaid chef living in her own home.
• Firming face creams or lotions for wrinkly eyes/sagging jowls - we want to believe you don’t see our ‘laughter lines’ so NEVER suggest we try something to ‘up' our regime to help an issue.
• Anything you buy in your local pharmacy is OFF the list. This isn’t part of your regular online grocery order, so even if she mentioned she needed some deodorant or shaving cream, don’t you dare try to wrap it…. I don’t care if its useful, it is NOT a gift.
• Tooth whitener is particularly offensive - giving such a gift suggests your girlfriend has brown teeth… this isn’t going to win you any points.
• Any products we hide from you are a NO (think electric razors/defrizz/wax strips/hair remover) - you should pretend you don’t know we do this stuff.
• General household DIY items are just that ….HOUSEHOLD GENERAL items and do not have a place in a Xmas stocking. Even if you remember your other half telling you ‘an electric drill would be handy to have around’ that was NOT a hint…. it was a passing comment.
• Sexy/themed/scratchy underwear. Whilst elegant underwear is great to receive, it is another thing to receive a scratchy sailor girl/nurse themed underwear that we would never actually wear. If you are going for the latter then its a gift for you…. not her… so wrap it up for yourself.
• Sex toys are a fun item but do not constitute a proper gift. Firstly be mindful of her opening such a gift in front of others (you don’t want to give the in-laws a heart attack) - but secondly, Christmas isn’t the time to give an indirect hint about you wanting a particular type of action in the bedroom. Watch a movie in your guy time.
• Stuffed toys are just a no. NO NO NO, unless you are a teenage boy buying it.
• Exercise videos, weights and weight loss equipment should be avoided. That is not a subtle hint at all.